12 people on the start sheet but 13 Titans in the clubhouse signing in. Have the wheels come off the super-slick IOC organisation or can the golfing behemoth adapt and find a solution? Of course it was the latter and Keith "Jelly Legs" Embleton was admitted to the mighty contest at the beautiful Harleyford Golf Course.

Ever grateful - Keith them went on to win the bloody thing with 30pts - oh how the others muttered especially playing partner Pete "Spitting Fury" Doherty who was ultimately pushed into 7th place. However he did win LD along with the winner of the last outing - Phil "Wrong Fairway" Schick. More about him later. Tod won NP2 with a very close effort.  I would like to tell you about the other minor prize winners but there were NONE.  No-one on the green at the 160yd 6th and no-one on the green at the 150 yard 12th! Abyssmal,  although in fairness James "off-spinner" Mansfield did hit the 12th and spun back 2" to be off the green - shouldn't have hit the 3rd groove from the bottom James!

And in a crazy day of count-backs, four players shot 27pts with Prez gaining 2nd place, Tod 3rd, Captain Will 4th and Greg 5th. Ben secured 6th on count back from unfortunate Pete.  What prize have I forgotten?  Oh yes The glorious Magni Prize was won in style by Phil - true hero to zero stuff. Andrew Coooke was sure that he had won it but Phil beat his meagre score by a full 6 shots!! 

Rumours abound that IOC top dogs Roary McLeeRoy and G-Mac were seen in lengthy discussions with senior R&A officials about a possible merger in 2020.

Following the success of fellow golfing compatriots McIlroy, Clarke & McDowell in getting the Open to come to Northern Ireland, the IOC apparently sent the Golfing Titans McLeeRoy and G-Mac to Portrush to seal this additional deal.

Local newspapers are also reporting on the possibility that part of the agreed deal was to send out McLeeRoy in place of world Number 3 McIlroy. This could help explain why he shot that horrific +8 opening round?

But the bigger mystery is around the whereabouts of IOC Tour Director Pete Doherty. Why isn’t he in Portrush negotiating this deal? Rumours from America suggest that he may be negotiating an even bigger deal to get the Autumn Super Titans announced as the 5th Major. The leading players here this week are said to be super excited to be playing at Pine Ridge. Fowler and Rose have been spotted playing sneaky practice rounds which as we know is well established Titans protocol!

It was a small group that enjoyed playing at the impressive Merrist Wood Golf Course today - Apparently there was some cricket game on that may have tempted some not to try their hand at golf - oh and a tennis match too. Merrist has been off the Champions tour for a 3 or 4 years because it was in poor condition when we last played it but it was in very good shape today. 

The early running was made by Greg but his normal back 9 explosion meant that from a winning position he managed to win Magni! However he managed to win the long drive prize after no-one else hit the fairway. Indeed no regular players won the NP, the NP2 or the money hole!. Guest James did hit one close at the NP hole and guest Gary did likewise at the Money Hole. Both sank their birdie putts - but won nothing as guests. Unlucky.  

Phil won Magni last time out but was the winner today with 27 points. Pete was second with 24 and Rob third with 23. Poor Greg trailed in with 22. James won the guest prize but the shot of the day was  definitely Gary's drive on the third hole where he managed to hit the yellow tee marker almost as far as his drive!  Amazingly the driver survived. ​

Apologies to all that saw the initial blog about England's spectacular victory over the Rest of the World at Hoebridge on Sunday. The TitansTalker has been given a good talking to about Titans values and he is repentant. His punishment was to write a glowing review of England's magnificent success.

Already school children are being taught the names of the special ones - Embleton, Chadwick, Walters, Fish, Harris and Nash. Gone are Moore, Peters,  Hurst and Charlton. 

Prez Walters inspired his troops by wearing his Fourth Panzer insignia on his chest but should he not have played for RoW? 

Private Godfrey beat Phil Shickelson 2&1 in the opening match. Isn't the resemblance to Godfrey incredible?

Private Walker and Montie Smith had a ding dong battle eventually drawing their match. Will picked up the only score for the RoW! Ben did win LD as well

Private Pike beat Pete-raig Harrington by winning the 18th.

Lance Corporal Jones had the biggest victory defeating Charles Langer 7&5.  He must have played amazingly well as Charles won NP & LD

Another amazing likeness! Sgt Wilson beat RoW hot shot 2 Jags Prescot 2&1

And in the final match the English Captain Mannering got off to a terrible start by scoring 9 on the 1st.  However GMac shot 10! Graham won 2&1.

Congratulations to England on a convincing 5 1/2pts to 1/2pt win. 

England won - Enough said already.

(Editor - are you sure there is nothing more to say?
TitansTalker - NO)

​TBC

Sadly it is a very short TitansTalk this week as the Titans Talker was on holiday and the feedback from the traumatised players was limited. Additionally the normally slick Titans operations on the day were more like an oil slick with the Prize Markers not being left out, no prize balls were available and the winner did not even get their photo taken!

The course was judged to be in good nick. The greens were fast and difficult to judge. The weather was fine and a gentle breeze made it a comfortable day out.
​
Keith the Elder scored 28pts to win the day, just edging out the Prez (27) and Paul (25). Phil S had a tragic day winning Magni on count back (ouch) with 16pts.  James won the guest prize. Frank won the money hole and Tod won the NP but nobody knows who won the rest! With his second place Prez has retaken the top spot in the Race to Badgemore from Tod.

The bacon rolls were smashing. Two rashers of bacon and a sausage all in a crispy roll - 9.5/10 made it the best score of the day.